If you are a motorsport fan, car enthusiast, gear head, grease monkey, or whichever of the current nomenclature piques your fancy then you have undoubtedly found yourself in the grandstand of a motor race. Odds are you have also found yourself completely bored out of your mind. Even seasoned fans find that most of the race, especially the part in the middle, can be an excruciating form a self-punishment. Much like flying an airplane the only interesting bit is the take-off and landing or the start and finish. The rest of the flight is occupied with pirated movies and naps. Event organizers have realized this years ago and have employed various sideshows to keep the masses awake and engaged. Ever wonder why La Sarthe has a Ferris wheel? Or why The Circuit of America’s has an amphitheater in the infield? Humans need filler to bide the time between the green and checker flags. While organizers need your eyes wide open to take in all the product placement. So, racing is boring and you should go. End of the article, right? Well don’t jettison your attention just yet because I have a theory.
Start with golf, bear with me here because golf is another objectively boring sport where most of the event is, well uneventful. Yet it still commands a large following. Why? Because most of us have played golf or have been to a driving range at one point. Thus, every stroke the pro’s make can be related to our own. We can share in their triumphs and failures because in some fashion we have felt it, albeit on a lesser stage. And for most car guy/gals this rings true as well. We sit on the sidelines of race fascinated because of the perceived shared experiences with the driver and in most instances, we believe that we could do better.
In fact, this is what a dub the “gear head paradox”. Which is that all gear heads/car enthusiasts believe they are superior drivers solely because they can recognize the tumbling patter of a boxer engine with unequal length headers. Or at the very least they believe they are entitled to a faster car despite lacking any formal advanced driver training. Even worse most car geeks will gladly pour thousands of hard earn dollars into making their cars go quicker, often making their cars worse but that’s another article, while simultaneously complaining that driving school is too expensive or they know everything all ready. Most people vastly overestimate their driving abilities, not excluding myself. To find exhibit A all you need is to look no further than a YouTube of “Mustangs leaving Cars and Coffee” search. There you will find what our boys in blue call “displays off speed” ending in spectacular disasters and bruised egos. But by far the biggest fallacy is thinking “All I need is more seat time.” While it is true that seat time is as important as practice for any athlete. Getting seat time without coaching or a goal is like interviewing for a job without knowing what the job is. You’re not going to get it and you’re probably wasting your time.
Now, if you have been motivated enough to search for a school in your area you’ll find two things. First, racing schools are expensive. Often pricing over a thousand dollars for just one day of school, most won’t even give you any kind of certificate or licensing for your troubles. Secondly, most schools require you to bring your own car or you can rent one of theirs for a fee. If you already have tight purse strings this will only exacerbate your troubles. I am dead broke and own a truck. So, strike one and two for me. But I hadn’t struck out yet as my Google searching proficiency was about to hit pay dirt, literally. After hours of searching I finally ended on Rally Ready Ranch, a rally school just outside of Austin, Texas. And this school overcame two hurdles. First, it was very well priced, about $450 for a Stage 1 experience. And secondly, I didn’t need to provide a vehicle. Which saves you some cash and is handy if you only own a truck like myself.
So, after eagerly scheduling my session I immediately started YouTubing rally driving basics. This was mostly driven by a paranoia that the instructor would put my name on black list and ban me for not being Colin McCrae on my first day. I’ve never been to a racing school so I assumed this was standard practice. I figured that watching videos would at least would give me head start but I would soon learn that I there is a big difference between watching a thing and doing a thing. So, after a sleepless YouTube filled night I set off to my version of summer school, which ended being well off the beaten path. Winding left and right on dusty back roads which were already roasting in the 108-degree Texas heat despite only being early morning. Finally, after a dizzying number of bumpy roads I was greeted by what seemed to be the entrance to a working ranch. Only the livestock was herds of 4WD Japanese Kobe beef rather than the iconic Texas Longhorn. This must be the right spot.
From there I parked my truck and made my way to the two-story “barn” with car stables on the first floor and the air-conditioned class room on the second. There we got to know our instructors, promised we would be safe and urbane pupils, and signed our life away on the dotted line. Excited to get on with the learning we initiated ourselves with full threshold braking in 2WD Hondas, 2000 Civic sedan and an Integra. Getting a feel for straight line braking on a loose surface came easy and all students passed with flying colors. Next, we lined up for the figure eight and this is where the learning curve started to get a bit sharper.
The lesson started with the instructor telling me to not let of the accelerator, ever! Even if I am applying the brake for the turns, do not let off the accelerator! Which became apparent for two reasons. Point one: the brakes are powerful enough to stall the car so there is no need to let off. Second point: letting off the throttle changes the cars balance and will end up spinning. This seemed counterintuitive to daily driving habits but hey not all things make sense at first. The other goal of the figure eight was to demonstrate how to use the brakes to steer the car around the turn.
So, I put the Honda into gear and proceeded to shift into second onto the figure eight. After making a few turns around the dusty bend everything that initially seemed counterintuitive came quite naturally. Knowing that I didn’t have to do much with my right leg while it was pressed the throttle firmly into the firewall left my mind to take in the rest of the experience. Like listening to the instructor about hand positioning and steering input. Steering input was last on my mind but it seemed to be a struggle for me. I persisted to oversteer the car with the steering wheel and then subsequently switching to over correcting. Turning smooth turns into sloppy jagged turns. I assumed that drifting around a bend would require huge angle and huge amounts of steering wheel thrashing. Like a protagonist in an action movie sawing at the wheel to get away from the baddies. But since I wasn’t driving in an MGM studio I had to retrain my brain. It really came down to trusting that the steering wheel does only about half of the job and the rest is up to using the brakes to get the car turned.
After a few unsure moments, I found a groove and enjoyed the session. Though we quickly moved to the next portion, the slalom. This bit I was most nervous for. I watched countless videos of people spinning off and mowing down cones. It seemed out of all the sessions of the day this would be the most important. Making it through cleanly would show that you had some talent and could be taught. Not making would mean picking up cones and a bruised ego. Luckily, I would not be the first to set off and watched a student have a go in the Acura Integra.
Remember when the instructors told us to never let go of the accelerator? Well, after the Integra made it comfortably through one slalom he turned to make his return journey through the slalom course. Only this time with was a bit more confidence and zest. As he rounded the cone in the middle of the course it became clear that he had just a bit too much pace to complete the next turn. Now this is where you keep in mind the mantra to not let go of the accelerator! He burped the throttle to scrub some speed but the car also gifted him extra rotation. And a big extra it was. The slalom turned into a skid which turned into a heroic catch and ended in the car going straight of course into the surrounding high brush. Lesson learned. Now time for my go.
With the mantra freshly framed in my mind we set off and I did something I have never done before. I shed my typically stoic mannerisms and talked to my self through the steps. Yelling at my hands “Full throttle, Turn, Dab of brake” and repeated “Turn, dab of brake”. I was verbally commanding my body. It may have been a bit embarrassing and awkward but hey I nailed it! No heroic catches or sudden skids. Just smooth and fast pendulum swings around the cones. It even earned a rousing high five out of my instructor. Scary bit done. Onto the final shebang.
Like all well proctored classes the penultimate session isn’t just another lesson to check the box off. No, now you must prove that you were paying attention. And at Rally Ready Ranch that means one hot lap around the Special Stage. No more cones and the safe familiarity of going around the same turn. Instead I would be throwing myself onto the unknown course, drive what I can see, and channel my inner Stig Blomqvist. Oh, and don’t forget to not let go of the accelerator.
Anxiously, I waited on the starting line, feeling the Texas heat steaming the interior of our unairconditioned Japanese sedan. Waiting for the dust trails of the first student to clear from the course. After what seemed like an eternity I finally get the nod from the instructor and set off at full chat. This would be my last drive of the day so I wanted to get as much out of the little inline-four it would offer. Immediately I was stricken with how bumpy the course was. The rubble clanged off the floor pans loud enough to distract me from the Civic’s scream out of the removed exhaust. But the car still cut cleanly through the ruts and slippery dust. I must say I was impressed with myself again. Planting my right foot to the floor as if I had a wooden peg leg while using my left foot gently on the brake modulating the cars attitude. And to add I finally toned down the sawing action of my hands on the steering wheel using only just enough turn in and relied on the brakes to shift the weight of the car, dig in the front tires for traction, and smoothly get the car turned. I felt my mind slip from how fast I was going to how I was balancing the weight of the car. Certainly, at this point I was one with the car. Finishing the stage, I felt instant relief. Anxiety shed itself away and I was elated to have learned how to be a quicker driver.
And a fair bit was learned. I finally understood how to use the brakes for more than just slowing down the car. Most importantly, learning how to use weight transfer and have the mind keen on weight balance was monumental to me. It was my first formal lesson ever and it was money well spent. I couldn’t thank the instructors enough for all their efforts and persistence.
Shortly after this may class I returned to Rally Ready Ranch to compete in their Rallycross event. Which if you haven’t done one yet, do it. Again, it was surprisingly affordable although I did have to rent one their cars for the event (I still only own a truck). But it turned to my advantage as I was able to secure the Honda Civic. The very same car I did the class. Long story short in my first race of any kind I placed 2nd in the 2wd stock category! Which was, if you allow me to brag, against much newer more powerful cars than my clapped out 2000 Honda Sedan. So, if you don’t want to get beat by yours truly or if you simply want to have an affordable motoring weekend check out Rally Ready Ranch (RallyReady.com) in the Austin, Texas Area.